Even my virtually non-existent expectations were unmet.
Burton follows the same arc—and often, scenery, too, from topiaries and gardens to a Floridian suburbia reminiscent of Scissorhands and Big Fish’s town of Spectre—but gets nowhere.
There's a pub scene, about thirty minutes in, that bears promise. And the home itself is beautiful.
But the rest is vapor, and departs from memory as quickly as it came.